Saturday, February 5, 2011
Greetings!
I'll be back!
Tuesday, May 20, 2008
Thursday, April 17, 2008
Walking With God - He Still Speaks
John is as eloquent and entertaining in person as he is in his books. His down to earth, practical style is appealing to the ear and his beliefs are sound and biblical. He talked about learning to hear God speak and getting quiet enough to do so in the chaotic world we live in. We practiced learning to listen and hearing God’s voice a few times at the lecture but I only heard myself say, “I love you, I love you”. I have heard God speak to me a few times over the years and I do believe that he still speaks to us and desires to lead us but that night He didn’t speak to me. Armed with his new book in hand, the evening ended much too soon for me.
Today as I was reading “Slowing Down to Listen” out of John’s new book “Walking with God” I decided to give it a try by asking God a simple question. I prayed, “Lord, Do you want me to clean the basement or continue to read”. I followed John’s suggestion of trying on each question and see if I got any negative feelings or heard the Lord’s voice directly on which option to do. I heard nothing. So I tried again, “Lord, do you want me to clean the basement then?” Pause. Nothing. “Lord, do you want me to read then?” Pause. Nothing. Tried again. Nothing. Tried again. Nothing but silence on each question. So I said, “Lord I’ll just read until you tell me what you want me to do”. And then it came. “Marie, call Marie”. Oh dear, that wasn’t the question and I didn’t want to call Marie. Again, “Marie, call Marie”. You see I’ve been thinking of Marie for quite a while and knowing I need to call but just not following through. Her husband, John was an ex-patient of mine at Hospice who I befriended when he was transferred to another facility. I had traveled to see him for over a year at that facility until he died. He had lung cancer and Marie also has cancer. John had asked me to watch over her before he died. Something I have failed to do. But today the Lord told me what I needed to do. I called Marie.
Later on in the day when I sat down to read some more, John pointed out that sometimes when we question God he will tell us something that we are not asking at all. And so He had… “call Marie” he had said.
He still speaks. He doesn’t always say what we want to hear. But He still speaks.
Saturday, March 29, 2008
My Mother Likes Me Again

Now she likes me again:

Don't know why she's so fickle!
Thursday, March 13, 2008
A Man Who Lies
We seemed to connect in so many ways. We liked some of the same things; we disliked some of the same things. We had an easygoing manner together. We laughed together. We talked together. We did the things that couples do and we planned to be married. We planned our future together.
Back in the beginning, when I first discovered he lied I made excuses and blamed myself. Maybe if I was better at handling the truth he wouldn’t lie. After all, I had my own issues. I made numerous excuses for his bad behavior. Meanwhile I was honest, loyal, and giving. I told the truth even when it might cause an argument. I changed in ways that made him happy. I quit complaining about the overtime he worked. When I felt lonely, I learned how to entertain myself rather than depending on him to entertain me. I grew as a person. For that I am thankful. Yet, he continued to lie. He lied to avoid arguments and he lied to cover up. He lied to get his way. He lied.
One day, when he looked into my eyes and told the biggest boldest lie he had ever told I decided enough was enough. I finally realized I deserved better. I deserve a man who I can respect. I realized I cannot respect a man who isn’t capable of honesty.
Now he will go on to his next love and she will be the one to decide if she has enough self respect to demand more. As I think about the love lost and the potential we had I feel sorry for him…so very sorry and yet within there is a hope that somewhere there is a man who will look deeply in my eyes and know that to lie to me would be like death itself to his soul and he will be the man I can respect and share my love with.
Thursday, February 7, 2008
NCL Cruise - Majesty Ship
Four games of Bingo ended up costing me 40 bucks and the cash prize of only 100-150 bucks a game seemed really small. Although this did include a Jackpot game worth 1000 bucks they only allowed you so many numbers to fill your card (they didn't tell you this fact while paying to play). No one won the jackpot.
In the casino I put 10 bucks in money changer thinking I needed quarters to play the slots. After realizing the slots only took dollars, I cashed in the quarters to be given back $9.95. The change machine shafted me five cents...while it was only a nickel there were countless people using the change machine...the boat operates 7 days a week 10 months a year...you do the math.
Wednesday, December 19, 2007
Christmas Blessings
She’s thirteen now and the times are very rare when she asks me to play with hair. Today I was working on getting some holiday baking done and had sat down on the sofa for a moment to take a break. Jessica was watching a movie and said, “Mom, play with my hair”. My first thought was to respond, “I can’t right now, I’m just taking a break…I’ve got things to do”. But thankfully my brain engaged with my heart and I said, “ok, come here”.
As I sat with my daughter’s head in my lap and played with her hair I realized that one day she won’t ask me anymore as the times are far and few between now. Perhaps she will one day have her own little girl who will ask her to play with her hair. As I pondered these thoughts a tear fell as I also reflected on the fact that one day I won’t be here to do this for her. She will look back at this time and remember me playing with her hair and will no longer be able to ask me to do this. She will remember her mother’s hands in her hair.
I closed my eyes and I felt her soft hair between my fingers and I reveled in the moment of having my daughter still want me to do this today and I was thankful. I prayed blessings upon her with my hands in her hair…prayers that God would protect her and love her and help her grow up healthy and whole. I thanked God that I am here today and that in this moment all is right with our world.
May each of you find joy in each moment with your own loved ones during this holiday season. God Bless Each One of You!
Monday, October 15, 2007
New "Do"
I go tomorrow for enrollment and then back Thursday for Hospital Orientation...fun fun. Then I get an actual schedule. The adjustment will be in going from days to nights but being off two out of three weekends will be great!
Friday, October 5, 2007
New Job
I'm excited to be starting but at the same time very apprehensive. I called and talked to my supervisor today and told her I was really nervous. She reassured me which made me feel better. I feel like a new grad! It will be exciting to work with mothers and baby (this will be couplet care). I'll be there when the babes take there first breath and then help mom and babe until time to go home.
I remember the last birth I helped at...a friend of mine decided to have her baby during Hurricane Hugo. It was an exciting and wild nights. Trees were crashing into the windows and at one time the power went off and the generators failed. The nurse was in there checking my friend with a flashlight. Nerves were on edge and when my friend insisted it was time to push (at 9 cm) the nurse said, "oh go ahead". Though I begged her not to push yet...2 1/2 hours later a beautiful baby girl was born via forceps delivery. The doc said my friend had a "vaginal c-section" with over 100 stitches to sew her up. Needlesstoday, it was a memorable experience.
As I begin my new job change, I will try to remember that experience and advise patients wisely. (Even in the event of a hurricane) Wish me luck in my new adventure...
Hospice was for God--this one is for me!
Thursday, July 12, 2007
Men Who Hunt and Fish
When I found out my boyfriend Robert likes to fish and hunt I must say I was very wary. I had been married to a Sportsman early on in my life and had experienced a lifestyle where the world revolved around preparation for fishing and hunting, fishing, fishing trips, sports stores, hunting, hunting trips, cleaning fish, cleaning meats, freezing, cooking wild game and fish, along with endless conversation revolving around large mouth bass, crappies, trout, mountain deer, antelopes, and elk. Sitting alone or finding something to do on my own was the norm many times as this man could not balance me and the sport. My experience with a Sportsman had not been that great.
When Robert and I first started seeing each other I was impressed by his intensity in his pursuit of me. An old fashioned gal, I truly believe that men are at their best when pursuing a woman and I enjoyed immensely his determination to catch me. Although he now knows he has won my heart, he continues the pursuit as he courts me with flowers, candy and sweet words of love. This is not an ignorant man.
What I have come to understand about fishing and hunting is that it is much more than just a hobby. It fulfills the need men have to pursue and catch. The excitement lies in hooking the fish or animal and bringing him in.
While at times I may not be happy that he is 'gone fishin' yet again, I can rest assured that he is being a man doing what men do their best…pursuing and catching. If fishing and hunting feed his need of pursuit then who am I to complain…it definitely works better than pursuing other women!
Sunday, June 10, 2007
The Premonition
Since that time, I've been thinking more about my life and the choices I've made. I've come to the conclusion that the only regret I have is that I have held so much love inside that could have been shared with others. In trying to protect my own heart from hurt I withheld love. I think about leaving my family and them not having received all the love I had to offer. I think about the people I've met in my life who could have benefited from more of me. I want to leave knowing that I didn't hold back.
This summer Tammy and I are spring cleaning our houses together. It is the time to get things in order. This summer I'm taking off school and giving more of myself to my children, family, and friends. This summer I'm appreciating the wonderful man who has come into my life. I'm listening more closely and paying attention to the little things. I don't know when God will take me home. But right now I am alive and I am thankful to be given the chance to do away with regrets! I am thankful to be given the chance to love...at such a time as this!
Wednesday, May 2, 2007
Happy Birthday Followup
Friday night proved to be a hoot! We arrived at our lovely OMNI hotel room (with those comfy beds) and started mixing our Buttery Nipples. They were good and Jessica and I managed a few shots while Nickcola had no problem in throwing back quite a few larger shots. After drinking, we headed down to the motor lobby and out to the streets of downtown Charlotte heading toward the Breakfast Club. The club was not as busy as on a Saturday we had went but it had enough people there. DJ Dan was not working this night but another DJ. She wasn't as good as DJ Dan but we still managed to dance for at least two hours. Nickcola had quite the "good buzz" and Jessica was happy as she danced for the first time with a guy!
After dancing, we headed back to the room where Nickcola proceeded to crawl from the comfy bed to the bathroom and back TWICE before landing in the bathroom landing to pass out. We laughed and talked and had a hilarious time while Nickcola crawled back and forth. We left the curtain open that looked out on the lights of downtown Charlotte from the 11th floor. At 6:00 a.m. the sunrise was beautiful. Nickcola made it off the bathroom floor to bed at this time. Then she and I started talking and woke Jessica up and then we all talked and lounged around in those beds. We checked out around 11:30 and headed back home...stopping at the GoodWill in Cornelius...Found some great shoes.
Later that night, in my navy button up dress and navy heels I met Robert to go to the Best Cellar. He looked really sexy in his black shirt and khaki pants! He complimented me very nicely on my dress and looks when he saw me. We drove to Blowing Rock and I so enjoyed the raspberry duck. Robert had the Bleu cheese Ribeye (which was also delicious!). I told Robert that I loved duck so much I was tempted to take up duck hunting if he would cook them for me...he said I would have to clean them so that lets that idea out! The trip back down the mountain and the remainder of the evening coupled with the wonderful meal at the Best Cellar definitely make this birthday date my all time favorite one ! Thank you Robert!
On Sunday (my birthdate), I went into work and had a great day. The patients were all stable and everything was very peaceful. My two assistants brought presents and I had cake! It was a good day.
Thanks to everyone who made my 46th birthday so very special!
Thursday, April 26, 2007
Happy Birthday to Me!
entertainment center and knew I was needing a new one.It was in pretty pitiful shape (after being in storage and having boxes stored on it there was considerable cosmetic swooping damage not to mention the dust). I SAID DON'T MENTION THE DUST!
A couple of days later, Robert and my brother-in-law attempted to get it in the house by dolly ( I had opted out of the transferral of furniture to the living room).
Friday, April 20, 2007
Wednesday, April 18, 2007
Update from North Carolina
My family and I have been traveling to Chimney Rock for years. A few years back my sister happened across a dirt road called "Hog Road" which led to a little dirt path called "Edge of the World". Traveling down this little goat path will lead you literally to what is the edge of the world. This awesome view is indescribable and if you happen to end up in Western North Carolina I highly encourage you to take a trip to the edge of the world.
The Chimney:
Hickory Nut Falls:
Hickory Nut Gorge:
Another view of the Gorge:
The Needle's Eye:
There are some interesting stories about Chimney Rock and the Hickory Nut Gorge. One involves a Presbyterian minister living there in 1806. There were eyewitnesses including the minister who reported seeing people (men, women, and children) flying around the side of Chimney Rock. The minister reported that the people were dressed in clothes so brilliantly white it hurt his eyes to look at them. Prior to that, the Cherokee Indians who inhabited the land had reported seeing such sights and they referred to them as "The Little People". When visiting Chimney Rock and the Hickory Nut Gorge you can well imagine the sight of angels or "the little people" floating around these inspiring hills.
Thanks to Robert for making the Chimney Rock day so memorable!
On another note, Lisa Vella (Getting it Write for You) tagged me with a meme asking "What Is Your Favorite Type of Writing?"
As a new writer, I don't think I have quite figured out what my favorite thing to write is. After publishing two little articles on Associated Content, I then jumped into a nonfiction book of which I have finished 103 pages and thrown on the back burner. The problem was after completing this many pages, I read another book about the same subject that said basically everything I had wanted to say. I had a gread idea but someone else beat me to it! In the process of writing this book, I found the passion and joy in writing! I then started working on more nonfiction articles (have since had one published) and also began delving into writing fiction.
Currently, I have a humorous short story in the fiction genre entered in a contest. I'm anxious to see if it makes it to the finals as I really enjoyed doing the piece. My challenge as a new writer is finding and making the time to write. There is such joy in the writing process that it is something I hope to learn to effectively incorporate into my life on a regular basis.
I am tagging:
Anne from Anne Brooke's Writing Journal
Dan from Dan's Blah Blah Blog
and Vickie M. Taylor
Wednesday, April 11, 2007
Dying Well
Tuesday, April 3, 2007
Easter and Church People
My mom was up there this a.m. helping to prepare the 40 plates for the jailer to pick up and take back to his prisoners. Bojangles had donated 100 biscuits to the prisoner cause of which my mother voiced appreciation to other members while preparing breakfast.
A church member piped up and says, "I don't know why we have to feed them prisoners anyway, Let's just let Bojangles feed em' next year altogether" in a nasty little manner. Plates were heaped as the man's remark were ignored and the jailer picked up the welcome breakfast for his prisoners and fellow guards. Why is it that church people are afraid to address hypocrisy within their own peoples?
I do not attend church. Hospice is my church. However, in the mail this week a man will open an envelope to find these verses:
Matthew 25:43-45 I was a stranger, and ye took me not in: naked, and ye clothed me not: sick, and in prison, and ye visited me not... Then shall he answer them, saying, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye did it not to one of the least of these, ye did it not to me. And these shall go away into everlasting punishment: but the righteous into life eternal.
I'm heading to the Post Office now! Happy Easter Everyone!

















